A caregiver yearned to take a bird photography class with her local museum, but she needed help. There was no one to watch her loved one on class day, and she couldn’t afford to hire somebody.
The Kathi Koll Foundation learned of her plight and surprised her with a substitute caregiver for the day. She was thrilled and delved into her class, learning about photography and taking picture after picture of birds. In the process, she not only felt filled with joy, she was reinvigorated and replenished.
Her story exemplifies the vision for the Kathi Koll Foundation, which has now entered its 10th year. Every month, we gift caregivers with a well-deserved surprise. We’ve provided rent and utility payments to caregivers in danger of becoming homeless. We’ve purchased a stove, furniture, and wheelchairs. In the last five years alone, the Foundation has distributed hundreds of gifts helping caregivers in need, which in turn has helped their immediate families.
Some of my favorite presents may seem frivolous—a trip to Las Vegas, a mother-daughter jaunt to Disneyland, or a day at the spa. Yet, they are essential to a caregiver’s happiness. All of us need time to step away from our worries so we can relax and enjoy life, but caregivers often go without simple pleasures for months or even years.
I experienced the deep loneliness and sadness of being a caregiver when my late husband, Don, was paralyzed from the neck down. It was a piercing feeling, not knowing whether I was going to lose him day after day for almost seven years, while simultaneously working so hard to help him. But I also knew that we were fortunate. We had enough money to provide for his medical needs and also to allow me respite when many caregivers don’t.
After Don passed away, my intense life as a caregiver disappeared, not only was I sad, but felt a void and I wanted to find a new purpose. Understanding the life of a caregiver started me thinking about how I could help other caregivers. Caregivers in need without the resources I fortunately possessed. My favorite TV show as a child was the 1950’s show The Millionaire where a man knocked on an unsuspecting home and rewarded the family with a million dollars. It started me thinking about how I could do something similar. Surprise unsuspecting caregivers with gifts to help ease their pain and bring a little happiness in knowing they aren’t alone and that others understand their struggles. I liked the idea of brightening caregivers’ lives with a surprise gift that would help them, even if only for a short time. I also realized that respite in particular was not often provided by governmental sources or other organizations.
I connected with USC, UCLA, and other major facilities that could vet potential recipients, to ensure that we helped legitimate caregivers in need. The variety of caregiving difficulties that have emerged has been astounding. For example, one husband was determined to spend 24 hours a day sitting next to his wife’s hospital bed, so that she would never be alone. There wasn’t room for a second bed, so we bought him a Lazy Boy recliner. That way, he could sit beside her during the day and lean the chair back to sleep at night.
The thank you letters that I’ve received tug at my heart. The caregivers are so appreciative, not only for the monetary assistance but to know that someone cares and understands their challenges. The psychological boost is immense. Sometimes people break down in tears when we share what we’re going to do for them. Occasionally, I even have people recognize me from my monthly caregiving blog and share how much it has helped them. I feel so fortunate that my idea to help caregivers continues to blossom and bear fruit.
When I began, I had no idea that the foundation would be going strong 10 years later, but it’s become an integral part of my life—something I just do—and my friends and acquaintances have been incredibly generous in helping me raise the money to continue this work.
Everyone who has contributed or accepted a gift has been essential to the project, and the ripples of these gifts help not only the recipient and their loved one, but entire families. People are able to stay in their homes or buy new shoes for their children. It’s been a blink of time, and yet, I know it’s also made a difference for so many. Thank you for being a part of it.
Thank you for reading, please share with a friend, and be well! —KK
We are grateful to be celebrating our 10th year of helping caregivers in need and to be supported by the many generous and caring friends who have helped make a difference in so many lives.
Please consider donating to the Kathi Koll Foundation so you can help make a difference in struggling family caregivers’ lives. Thank you!
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